Why life is like Splash Mountain

I am a HUGE Disneyland fan. I think that Disney does families better than anyone else on earth and I love the creativity and whimsy in all their rides.

On the other hand...I hate free fall. Rides with enormous long drops scare the Bejeezus out of me. So for many, many years I avoided Splash Mountain. And the longer I avoided it, the scarier it became in my head. Now normally that's not an issue because I don't give a rat's rear end about the rides in most amusement parks. If I never go on the Loopdy Loop Roller Coaster of DOOM (or whatever it's called) I can live the rest of my life quite happily. But I REALLY wanted to see the ride part of Splash Mountain...I really really wanted to. All the bits before the long drop show the tale of Bre'r Rabbit and I was totally curious about that because I don't know the story very well and I thought it would be a treat to see a lesser known Disney story come to life...

So, a few years ago, I finally plucked up all my courage, waited in the hour long line and got on the ride...to be honest I don't remember much about the inside of the ride because I was so busy being terrified of the long drop coming up at the end of the ride. And let me tell you it was AWFUL. It went on for about 6 years and I thought it would never end...I seriously thought passing out might be a great way to deal with the whole experience. And I SWORE Never again.

But fate has a way of intervening on those things you swear about...so this trip we were walking by Splash Mountain at about 9pm...it was cold so the line was only 10 minutes and Maia (who is even more scared of big drops than I am) said..."I think I want to try it."

"You ratfink!!!! I was counting on you to save me from ever having to go on that ride again...and now I have to act like I am the grown up! I HATE it when you do that to me!!!"

But I plucked up my courage again and off we went. This time though I decided that I needed to just allow myself to die during the big drop. So I rode the ride and actually saw the story and enjoyed the Disney-ish-ness and when the drop came, I closed my eyes and opened my mouth and just let go...and it was over before it even started...what was I so dang scared of???

And as we walked away from the Mountain I realized that the first time I went on that ride, I tried to control the giant drop with the power of my mind...and I know you'll be SHOCKED to hear this, but it turns out I'm not very good at mind control...the second time, I just let it be what it was and it turned out to be fun...

So here's why Splash Mountain is like life:
1) You can't control the ride with the power of your mind.
2) Even though you know the big drop is coming...you might as well enjoy the scenery along the way. The big drop won't be less awful if you spend all your time anticipating it.
3) Bre'r Rabbit is sort of classist and racist and doesn't make much sense...but it sure is colorful when you Disney-fy the heck out of it!
4) If you decide you are going to die and you are going to be OK with that outcome you gain some amazing perspective on all the little stuff.
5) I'm probably not a fun person to go to amusement parks with...I'm at the point where even I wish I would shut up, stop philosophizing and just get on the damn ride!